Hey bro-bros, so I am happy to say that not having a girlfriend right now is really nice cause I can now focus on the important things in life like drinking. Whenever you have a girlfriend it seems like the drinking levels go down and you become all lame. You stay in and watch movies instead of going out and such and that's just lame.

Last night my heart tapped me on my shoulder and whispered in my ear "don't be a pussy all your life" and I walked up to a nice girl who I've had a crush on for a while and it actually worked. All you have to do is say hello. She now has our giant purple bouncy ball with my number on it. I'm really smooth. Smooooth.